All In a Family Way

My banks are all furnished with rags,

So thick, even Freddy can't thin 'em;

I've torn up my old money-bags,

Having little or nought to put in 'em.

My tradesman are smashing by dozens,

But this is all nothing, they say;

For bankrupts, since Adam, are cousins,

So, it's all in the family way.





My Debt not a penny takes from me,

As sages the matter explain; --

Bob owes it to Tom and then Tommy

Just owes it to Bob back again.

Since all have thus taken to owing,

There's nobody left that can pay;

And this is the way to keep going, --

All quite in the family way.





My senators vote away millions,

To put in Prosperity's budget;

And though it were billions or trillions,

The generous rogues wouldn't grudge it.

'Tis all but a family hop,

'Twas Pitt began dancing the hay;

Hands round! -- why the deuce should we stop?

'Tis all in the family way.





My labourers used to eat mutton,

As any great man of the State does;

And now the poor devils are put on

Small rations of tea and potatoes.

But cheer up John, Sawney and Paddy,

The King is your father, they say;

So ev'n if you starve for your Daddy,

'Tis all in the family way.





My rich manufacturers tumble,

My poor ones have nothing to chew;

And, even if themselves do not grumble,

Their stomachs undoubtedly do.

But coolly to fast en famille,

Is as good for the soul as to pray;

And famine itself is genteel,

When one starves in a family way.





I have found out a secret for Freddy,

A secret for next Budget day;

Though, perhaps he may know it already,

As he, too, 's a sage in his way.

When next for the Treasury scene he

Announces "the Devil to pay",

Let him write on the bills, "Nota bene,

'Tis all in the family way."